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Carol Perkins: Article to make Oprah feel bad Oprah could use Carol's help. But she just isn't paying attention to emails, messages, or even reading Carol Perkins' latest book: Let's Keep Talking About . . . The next earlier Carol Sullivan Perkins column: My Uncle, Oscar Sullivan, an amazing man another column about another aspect of the Metcalfe Co. Sesquicentennial. By Carol Perkins I don't know why I wasn't invited. Did she not know that I have been watching her for twenty-five years, taping episodes, quoting her, and even reading her rather boring book recommendations? Why was I not in the audience for the first show of the season? If I had been, I would have been packing my bags right now for Australia. Well, maybe not RIGHT now, but I would have been making plans. But no! No, no, no not me. I wasn't invited. What was she thinking when she overlooked the woman whose family will say, when offered unwanted advice, "You been watching Oprah again?" Did she not realize that I passed along her wisdom to students, "Be the best self you can be," or "Don't text and drive." Did she think I just dreamed up that stuff? As a matter of fact, she is the reason for these articles. "Everyone has a story," she once said, so I started telling mine. I told her that in a letter, but do you think she responded? NO She would be a big help on Oprah's trip Oprah could use me on her trip, if only she knew it. She is taking one hundred and fifty people, which means each one will want a piece of her time. I could organize her time with each guest. I am good at bossing. "Your turn to talk to Ms. Winfrey tomorrow at two, Ms. Jones, so show up in the Chinese Garden of Friendship." (I've done my research.) Oprah might travel with this group, but get real; does anyone really think she will hang out with them? She needs me for crowd control, too. Have you ever taken a bus tour and watched the guide maneuver tourists? I could do that. Tapping my watch and giving everyone twenty minutes or "we'll leave without you" would be a snap because I have experience. "If you're not back on this bus by five, we're pulling out!" Students on field trips never knew if I would or wouldn't. Oprah will need help to keep these people from wandering off and getting lost in the Outback. I wouldn't let that happen. Most on the trip will be women, and we all know we are difficult to satisfy. "Don't want to room with Ms. Parrot because she snores? No problem. I'll get you another room." It's Oprah's money; no expense spared for the comfort of the travelers. Lost something? No problem. I would make everyone happy...as long as I had Oprah's credit card. She would not be bothered with trifles. She would check the roll each morning Oprah needs me. I would be the person to check the roll each morning to make sure a guest didn't get lost or snatched. I've called roll all my life, so I know how to do it effectively. I have never lost a student. Keeping up with her guests wouldn't be simple, but we Americans are easy to spot in foreign countries because we're loud and have cameras around our neck. My greatest asset would be to engage them in conversation and keep them happy. Most people like to talk about themselves. I like to listen to them talk about themselves unless I have to hear the same stories more than twice. I would keep a journal devoted to the guests, and present it to Oprah when we arrived back home. She would journal a journal for Oprah She journals daily, so I would journal a journal for her. She needs a recorder of events. I might qualify for that job. Unless one of those who are invited drops out, I am probably not on a standby list. I doubt I have a chance unless one of you knows someone who knows someone. Thinks Oprah has snubbed her a few times Frankly, I may not be high on her list. I think Oprah might have snubbed me a few times. She hasn't acknowledged my emails, replied to my letters, or read my book that I sent to her. She has never taken one of my ideas for her shows, and I have sent her several. Even when I wrote that I didn't think she should say, "I need to go p**" on TV, she didn't respond but kept saying it. Even when I wrote to tell her that I thought she should have Jimmy Buffet on her season finale, she didn't answer me. That wasn't very nice. The only hope I have to be in that audience is if I send her this article, and she feels a little bad how she's ignored me all these years. Maybe if hundreds of people clip this article and mail it to her, we'll get her attention. Then again, we might end up on a frisk list. Nonetheless, I'll be glued to the TV as she fills her audience with what she calls "devoted fans" and wish she knew she has had one right here in South Central Kentucky for twenty-five years. I might just be a little hurt. This story was posted on 2010-10-03 05:14:26
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Have comments or corrections for this story? Use our contact form and let us know. More articles from topic Carol Perkins:
Carol Perkins: Let's Talk About...The Flood of 2010 Carol Perkins: When the morning began Carol Perkins: Lets talk . . . about Depps Restaurant Carol Perkins: A Free Trip Carol Perkins: School Bullies, Part II Carol Perkins article on School Bullies draws interest Carol Perkins: School Bullies I Carol Perkins: Parasailing Carol Perkins: London Carol Perkins: Hoosier hospitality in outlet mall View even more articles in topic Carol Perkins |
 
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