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Carol Perkins: Splain and Countersplain

Previous Column: Day trip to Green River Lake

By Carol Perkins

If you watch the news you might have heard a new word this week, mansplaining. Although a new way of saying it, there is nothing new about mansplaining. Ask any woman.

The irony is that for every man who "splains," there is a woman who "countersplains." The tone of a mansplainer is, "Are you kidding me?" or "what is wrong with you?" or "have you lost your mind?" or "you need me to straighten you out," which makes the term different from explaining.

A man might try to "splain" things to his wife or girlfriend and she may appear to listen, but most women have their own "splaining" to do.

Guy is talented when it comes to "mansplaining" especially these last seven months as I try to involve him in some of my projects.


When he doesn't want to cooperate, he tries to convince me of his wisdom.

"Adding to the deck would be expensive and useless." Translation: "I don't want to do it."

Another example: "We don't need a TV in the basement; we're never down there." On that, he is right. Recently, he saw no need to update the 1970s hardware on our kitchen cabinets.

"I like the ones we have." Translation: "I would have to change all thirty-eight pulls and knobs." When I presented the sample I wanted to use, he installed it, continuing to mansplain that the old one looked just as good as the new one. When I came home with all thirty-eight and he installed them, he said, "I hate to admit it, but the cabinets do look better." He's a good sport but wore my nerves thin trying to talk me out of the project!

Mansplaining is nothing new, but most women can hold their own. Rather than launching into an oration against her man's attempts to straighten her out, a woman usually does as she pleases while the man takes a breath. Women have grown in courage over the years.

If they hadn't ignored "mansplaining," they wouldn't have voted, owned property, served on a jury, gotten a loan or a credit card, fought in combat, traveled alone, smoked in public, worked while pregnant, divorced, or even wore pants, (among other things). Women did some strong "splaining" to gain certain rights and will continue to fight for them.

We all know of men whose wives are afraid to speak up or contradict them because of the consequences, but inside each of these women is a person who wishes she had the nerve to do a little "splaining." Give her time!


Carol's most recent book, based on a true story, The Case of the Missing Ring, is available through Amazon, both paperback and ebook. You can contact her at carolperkins06@gmail.com.


This story was posted on 2020-10-15 11:48:10
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